After the birth

• Caring for a young child 

Nicola S: And now

Epilepsy has not affected my being a parent. I have gradually reduced my drugs back to my pre-pregnancy dosage and I haven’t had a single seizure.
I made the decision to breastfeed having talked it through with my neurologist. There’s definitely no right answer to that one, but I felt that the benefits of breast feeding outweighed any small risk about the medication which would be passed on to my baby through my breast milk.
I breast fed through the night until six months when we switched to formula, but I still have to get up as it is impossible to get Gerald to wake up in the night. Once I slept in the spare room to get some decent kip but was woken up through two doors and half a flight of stairs by Oliver crying, and Gerald was still fast asleep!
Oliver slept through the night (from 1am to 7.30am) for the first time ever last night - it was the most sleep I have had since he was born. I am lucky that Gerald can go to work late and so can look after Oliver in the morning and I can get a bit more shut eye. With just one baby I was also able to sleep when he slept during the early weeks, but if and when we have another I think it could be more of a problem.

I can’t drive because of my epilepsy, but that might be a good thing, as having to walk everywhere has definitely helped get rid of some of the baby fat. It’s also exercise that you can do with your baby and is gentle enough to your body, which is recovering from nine months of hard work. 
I'm not sure if I had ‘pregnancy brain’ as I am so scatty anyway, and it's a side-effect of my epilepsy which doesn't help! However, since having Oliver (Mr Wrigley's real name) I think I have got worse (nappy brain). I've left my handbag in a cafe and at the checkout in Tesco twice, my passport and two forms of identity and application form on a table in Barclays, left my nappy changing bag at baby massage, and lost a pair of gloves the day after I bought them.
Now I have enlisted the help of all my friends to help me check that I haven't left anything behind, and I have a mnemonic to help me remember to take the most important things when I leave the house ('monkey's phone bill', which means: money, keys, phone, and pills). So far I have not left my baby behind anywhere, but I have heard stories of people (not with epilepsy) who have, which made me feel a bit better!

It’s hard work, sometimes relentless, and very tiring. But at the same time it is completely amazing, brilliant, fabulous, crazy, too much for words, the best thing in the world.
Advice to parents with epilepsy - don’t worry, be happy, everything will be all right.

Jennifer B: Don't let epilepsy rule your life

I've managed to keep on top of my epilepsy since the baby arrived, so it has had no affect whatsoever on our new life as parents.  Our advice to other parents with epilepsy is:
Don't let epilepsy rule your life. With sensible precautions there is no reason that you can't enjoy a full and satisfying role as a mummy. Just listen to the advice of those around you and definitely listen to your own instincts - they probably serve you best.

Ingrid M: Get your sleep!

Sleep when the baby sleeps – the housework can wait. This is especially important in those first few weeks when your baby thinks night time is wide awake time.

Have lots of snacks and drinks around (or someone to get them for you) if you’re breastfeeding as you’ll be sitting around feeding your little one for quite a while in the early days.

I always change my daughter on the floor and always have someone else there when she has a bath.

Get preconception counselling and do lots of research on epilepsy and your medications if you are taking any.  Don’t let health professionals bully you into making decisions you don’t want to take.  Maternity staff may not know very much about epilepsy so you need to be informed, listen to advice but trust your instincts.

Add your tips for parenting when you have epilepsy, take AEDs or have seizures here.

For more information about caring for a child when you have epilepsy, maintaining child safety during your seizures click on the following link; caring for a baby or toddler.

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