I was diagnosed with Epilepsy in 2006, at the age of 10 years old. During my last year of primary school, looking forward to my high school years. And from then on all, all that has done has spoiled my future. Being an A* student, told I was incredibly good at English in primary school, little did I achieve in high school.
I remember my first seizure and all the little auras I would get at such a young age; having to tell my mum and dad about them and having no idea what was wrong. Then, going to the doctors being diagnosed. It was incredibly traumatizing.
Ever since then, I have been unable to be covered by any medication 100%, trying nearly every medication in existence and have had multiple MRI's, EEG, and CT scans. Currently on zonisamide and perampanel.
After high school in 2011, trying college 3+ times with uncontrolled epilepsy was awful. With low attendance each time, missing too many lessons and too anxious to focus, I had little success in college. Not only in college, but university, unable to drive, and various other goals I can't achieve, all because this condition is heart breaking - especially uncontrolled. A life long condition is always hard for me to accept.
I always have to avoid the vicious circle of triggers such as stress, lack of sleep, hormones (difficult for a young lady) as much as I can. My medication comes with side effects that many people aren't aware of - nausea, anger, mood swings etc. Having a brain condition doesn't just affect your physical being, but also your mental health. Although I have the more than amazing family and friends who understand this so much, it is hard to explain how the side effects worry me as much as the seizures do.
It's incredibly horrifying not knowing when you might have a seizure, waking up afterwards and being told you've injured yourself. Ofcourse, the feelings of stress and frustration after. The afterwards feeling is just as bad.
However, I make sure my condition does not define who I am AT ALL. It does after all show me the strength and courage I have; the fact I have a job, travel the world, do modelling, and have a fiancé who is the most understanding person I have met. And finally am studying an adult college course, only to get me to university. The fact Is... if I can recover from an ordeal such as a seizure, I can live with this condition for now 10+ years, and the effects that come with it!