Using effective communication skills can make it easier to build respectful, helpful relationships with your healthcare providers and get the care you need.
Here are some examples of different techniques to help you communicate with your healthcare professionals.
The SEWR technique
SEWR is a simple structure for getting your point across in a clear, assertive way.
- S – State the facts: stick to what has happened
- E – Express your feelings: share the impact
- W – What you want: say what you would like to happen
- R – Reinforce the benefit: explain why it helps
Fogging
Fogging is a way of staying calm when someone challenges you or dismisses your concerns. Instead of getting defensive, you calmly recognise what they said and bring the focus back to your point.
For example:
GP: “Lots of people feel tired on this medication.”
You: “That may be true, but I’m finding the tiredness is stopping me from working, so I’d like to discuss alternatives.”
Why it works:
- Avoids arguments
- Shows you’re listening
- Keeps the focus on your needs
The broken record technique
Keep calmly repeating your key point until it is addressed. This prevents you from being dismissed or sidetracked.
Example: “I understand, but I’d still like a referral to a specialist.”
Sandwich technique
Wrap a request between two positives.
Example: “I really value the care I get here. But I am worried about the side effects I am having and I need a review of my medication. I really appreciate you helping me to solve this problem.”
Written advocacy (letter or email)
Sometimes it is easier to put things in writing. This means you have a record of the conversation and makes sure nothing is lost.
Your letter or email can follow a simple structure to outline the issue clearly and concisely.
Outline what has happened. Try to keep it factual and neutral. Be specific and include dates, names and relevant details.
Explain how this has affected you. This could be an emotional or practical consequence.
Say what you want to happen next. Try to be realistic and specific.
For example:
I had an appointment with Dr Smith at Town Hill GP Practice, on 15 May 2025. Dr Smith issued a new prescription to me for my epilepsy medicine. I asked her to write the brand name of the medicine (Frisium) on my prescription to avoid the pharmacist giving me a generic version. The generic version of the medicine does not stop my seizures, but the branded version does.
This was not done and the pharmacist gave me a generic version of my medicine. I am now very concerned that my seizures will not be controlled.
I would like assurance that any future prescriptions will specify that it is Frisium specifically and not a generic version. Then I can make sure I get the medicine that is most suitable for me.
I look forward to your response.
Find out more about switching between different versions of epilepsy medicine and how to avoid this.
Scenarios and scripts
Here are some examples of how these strategies might look in practice.
Scenario 1: you’re having side effects, but you feel that healthcare professionals dismiss your concerns by saying that all medicines have side effects.
“I’ve noticed since starting this medicine I’m very drowsy and forgetful. It’s affecting my work. Can we look at adjusting the dose or trying something different?”
Scenario 2: you know that you need a referral, but your healthcare professional has not made one yet.
“I’ve tried two different medications but I’m still having seizures. NICE guidance says I should have a regular epilepsy review with a doctor or nurse at least once a year. Could you please refer me urgently?”
Scenario 3: You need more support to understand what you are being told during healthcare appointments.
“I sometimes struggle to remember what we discuss. Could you write down today’s key points or give me a leaflet?”
Scenario 4: You feel that your healthcare professional is focusing on your physical symptoms and your mental health is not being considered.
“Living with epilepsy has been stressful and I feel anxious most days. Could I be referred to counselling or mental health support?”
Crisis and emergency advocacy
Sometimes seizures or medication side effects mean you cannot speak for yourself. Preparing in advance can make sure your voice is still heard.
Epilepsy medical ID products
Medical ID products can help if you want to let people know that you have epilepsy, and what they can do to help you. This can be especially useful if you have a seizure when you are out.
Find out more about epilepsy medical ID products.
Advance statements
An advance statement is a written statement that sets out your preferences for your future care. This can be helpful if you lose the ability to communicate or make decisions. An advance statement can act as a guide for anyone who needs to make decisions for you, such as a family member.
An advance statement can include things like:
- Where you would like to be cared for
- How you like to do things, for example if you prefer a shower instead of a bath
- Who you would like to look after any pets if you get ill
An advance statement is not the same as an advance decision, also known as a living will. An advance decision is legally binding, as long as it meets certain criteria.
An advance statement is not legally binding. But anyone who’s making decisions about your care must take it into account.
NHS has more information about advance statements.