When I was 7, I was diagnosed with Epilepsy. I had my first seizure without my family even knowing and I guess I didn't really know either, I just kind of woke up in the family study in the morning and thought I'd just sleep walked there. But apparently, I’d already eaten breakfast and played games with my brother that morning.
About a week later, my sister came upstairs to find me unconscious on the floor in the study. (My family told me the rest of the story.) The ambulance were called and no-one knew what was going on with me, and I was just a bit confused when I came around in hospital, to be honest.
The doctors diagnosed me with Epilepsy, but as I was 7 I didn’t really understand what it was. I had medication to start with, but it didn’t work and I continued to have 9/10 seizures before having it controlled. Everybody at school knew, and I didn’t mind really we talked about it and nobody really cared. I just dealt with it and got on with my life.
Epilepsy has only really hit me recently, now that I am nearly 15. I’ve never really understood the effects of it, so I decided to research all about it. I saw the different types of Epilepsy and all the different side effects of my medication and all about SUDEP. I watched a video of me having a seizure. I’ve had trouble with it recently, when people in my drama class try to make comments about flashing lights in performances saying, ‘Oh, We’re all going to have epileptic seizures at this!’ I’m always scared I’m going to have a seizure at school, so when somebody said this, I walked out of lesson and was terrified that it was actually going to happen.
My doctors have tried to take me off my meds before, but it hasn’t worked, so they’re more precautious this time and are giving me a sleep deprived EEG, which I’ve never had before, only EEG’s where I’m awake. I get upset sometimes thinking about having a fit at school or in front of friends or just having one again. I’m more aware now though of what’s happening to me and my best friend, Maria, knows all about my worries and she has been there for me and supported me throughout my whole journey and I love her for it. I know I can speak to her, whenever I am down about it and I’m glad to have that. So, I live a good life with Epilepsy, and nothing will set me off now, used to be flashing lights, but not anymore, I could just collapse any second really. I understand it more now, but I’m still precautious.
I used to be very careful and steady with decisions I made about doing things, in case of having a seizure and worried about it a lot. But now knowing more about it, and speaking to my doctor, I am less precautious and live happier, because it’s not always the first thing on my mind, but I don’t really think about it much now and have done many school performances and get to be with my friends, without being afraid of having a seizure, because I know that it’s controlled and safe now.